If you're separating and have children, understanding how BC actually handles "custody" is essential — and the terminology alone trips up a lot of parents, because BC doesn't use the word "custody" at all anymore. Here's how it actually works.
BC doesn't use "custody" — here's what it uses instead
Under BC's Family Law Act, the old language of "custody" and "access" was replaced with more precise terms that focus on the child's needs rather than a winner-and-loser framing:
Guardianship — the legal right and responsibility to make decisions about a child's care, including health, education, and major life decisions. A guardian also has the right to have the child in their care.
Parenting time — the schedule of when each parent has the child in their day-to-day care.
Parental responsibilities — the specific decision-making authorities a guardian has, which can be divided between parents (for example, one parent might have responsibility for medical decisions while both share responsibility for education decisions).
Contact — time with the child for someone who isn't a guardian, such as a grandparent or a parent without guardianship status.
Who is automatically a guardian in BC
Generally, if you lived with your child's other parent at any time after the child was born, both of you are automatically guardians, regardless of whether you were married. If you never lived together, the parent the child primarily resides with is typically the guardian, though the other parent can apply to the court for guardianship.
Guardianship doesn't automatically end when parents separate — both parents typically remain guardians, with the specifics of parenting time and decision-making worked out through agreement or court order.
How parenting arrangements get decided
There are three general paths to establishing parenting arrangements after separation:
1. Agreement between parents
The most common and least costly path. Parents negotiate parenting time and responsibilities themselves, often with the help of mediation, and formalize it in a written parenting agreement or as part of a broader separation agreement.
2. Mediation or collaborative family law
If parents can't agree directly but want to avoid court, a mediator (sometimes a lawyer trained in family mediation) helps facilitate an agreement. This is generally faster and less expensive than litigation, and tends to produce arrangements both parents are more likely to follow.
3. Court determination
If parents cannot reach an agreement, either can apply to court for a parenting order. The court decides based entirely on the best interests of the child — not on which parent "deserves" more time, or on fairness between the parents.
What "best interests of the child" actually means
BC's Family Law Act lists specific factors courts must consider, including:
- The child's physical, psychological, and emotional needs, including their need for stability
- The history of the child's care, including who has historically provided day-to-day caregiving
- The child's views, if they can be reasonably ascertained given the child's age and maturity
- The nature and strength of the child's relationships with significant people in their life
- Each parent's willingness to support the child's relationship with the other parent
- Any history of family violence and its impact on the child's safety and wellbeing
- The ability of each parent to care for and meet the child's needs
The child's views matter but aren't determinative — a court weighs them alongside everything else relative to the child's age and the reasons behind their preference.
Common parenting time arrangements
There's no default 50/50 arrangement under BC law — every situation is assessed individually. That said, common patterns include:
- Shared parenting — roughly equal time split between both parents, in arrangements like week-on/week-off or various 2-2-3 schedules
- Primary residence with parenting time — the child lives primarily with one parent, with the other parent having scheduled time (alternating weekends, certain weeknights, holidays)
- Supervised or restricted parenting time — used in situations involving safety concerns, where time with one parent is supervised by a third party or otherwise limited
What happens with major decisions
Parental responsibilities (medical decisions, choice of school, religious upbringing, etc.) can be allocated jointly (both parents must agree), divided by category (one parent decides medical, the other decides education), or allocated solely to one parent — depending on what's negotiated or ordered. Joint decision-making works well when parents communicate effectively; sole or divided responsibility is sometimes more practical in high-conflict situations.
When to get a family lawyer involved
Many separating parents in Nanaimo successfully negotiate parenting arrangements directly or through mediation without extensive legal involvement, particularly when both parents are reasonable and child-focused. A lawyer becomes important when:
- There's a history of family violence or safety concerns
- One parent wants to relocate with the child, especially out of province
- Parents fundamentally disagree on major decisions like schooling or medical care
- There are allegations of parental alienation or a child refusing contact with one parent
- The other parent has retained a lawyer or is being uncooperative
Even in amicable situations, having a lawyer review a parenting agreement before you sign it is worthwhile — it ensures the agreement is enforceable and addresses scenarios you may not have thought to include, like what happens during school breaks or as the child gets older.